


Too Much Chicken

by OnlyStraightForJongup



Category: B.A.P
Genre: BangDae - Freeform, Beginning of B.A.P, Cute B.A.P feels, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, More Serious Than It Sounds, Pre-debut B.A.P to current B.A.P, Romance, Soulmate AU, Taste everything your soulmate eats AU, himup - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-17
Updated: 2017-07-29
Packaged: 2018-12-03 11:42:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 18,428
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11531493
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OnlyStraightForJongup/pseuds/OnlyStraightForJongup
Summary: Bang Yongguk's soulmate really loves fried chicken.  And cheesecake.  And almost anything else he could get his hands on.  It wouldn't be a problem, if their soulmate bond didn't cause Yongguk to taste all of it.  Meanwhile, he's just accepted his role as B.A.P's leader and getting to know his dongsaengs proves to be more challenging than he anticipated.





	1. Assimilating

**Author's Note:**

> Hi everyone! I saw this prompt on tumblr (I can't find the link, sorry!!) for where you taste everything your soulmate eats, and I immediately thought that would make a great Bangdae prompt! So here's part 1 of it! Let me know what you think! It became a little more serious than expected (and a little longer) but I figure that's okay :)

Yongguk laid down on the dorm’s couch with a groan. He’d only just moved into B.A.P’s brand new dorms and met a few of the other people he’d be working with for a very long time, and now his stomach wanted to kill him. Or rather, fried chicken wanted to kill him.

Yongguk hated fried foods; he always had. His soulmate disagreed and had a clear love for fried chicken. They also loved dark chocolate and cheesecake. Any type of meat ranked up on their favorites list as well. Yongguk just stuck with ramen, but ever since he’d turned eighteen and at least his half of the soulmate bond opened, he got a variety of culinary experiences.

Yongguk’s pretty sure his soulmate eats everything in sight.

“Are you okay?” Kim Himchan, the second oldest in their little group, stopped by the couch, raising an eyebrow as Yongguk groaned. He considered ignoring Himchan; his discomfort was none of Himchan’s business, and he’d already proven much too talkative and curious in the week since Yongguk met him.

“Fine.” He moved his hands onto his stomach, wishing something could relieve the cramps. The vindictive side of him hoped his soulmate felt those too, but he doubted they did because otherwise they wouldn’t still be eating and Yongguk’s lips wouldn’t taste like chicken. Plus, even when dying of cramps, Yongguk had to admit he didn’t want his soulmate to hurt.

“You’re not fine,” Himchan said. He took a seat at the other side of the couch, and oh god, this was so awkward, and Yongguk was so awkward, and why did he think living in dorms like this would work out?

“I am,” Yongguk said. “It’s just – cramps.” Yongguk half-expected Himchan to make some ridiculous joke about him - _menstruating_ or something equally awful and follow it with his giant laugh. When Himchan only smiled in sympathy and grabbed him a softer pillow to slide under his abdomen, Yongguk realized he should probably give him more credit.

Himchan wasn’t a bad guy. Yongguk knew that. He was just – loud and intense, and he loved everything about this life that Yongguk hated. Himchan knew more people than anyone else on the planet, and he talked to all of them still and then still had energy for interviews and the social side of promotions. Sometimes listening to Himchan talk and be such an amazing, personable idol made Yongguk tired.

“Take some medicine,” Himchan said. “I can get you some.” He stood, only to pause when Yongguk shook his head.

“It doesn’t help,” he said. Himchan frowned, and Yongguk silently begged him to drop it. He figured Himchan saw his desperation because his eyes softened a little as he considered Yongguk.

“Maybe eat something?” Himchan tried instead. “You haven’t had dinner.” Yongguk shook his head vehemently. 

“No.” He tried to use his leader voice, which he discovered worked on Youngjae and Junhong, the other two bandmates he’d met already. Himchan only kept going, as if he didn’t even realize Yongguk wanted the conversation to end. If Yongguk didn’t hurt so much, he’d go find a hard surface to slam his head against. Or perhaps he’d slam Himchan’s head against it. 

“You need to eat, Yongguk-hyung. You were at the studio all today, and –” Yongguk cut him off with a quiet groan, curling up and holding his stomach.

“Is he okay, hyung?” a quiet voice asked from the hallway. Junhong, Yongguk realized, and he grimaced. What a great way for the maknae to see his leader and eldest hyung.

“He’s fine, Junhong-ah,” Himchan said. “Just stubborn. Like usual.” He and Himchan only lived together for a week, and Yongguk already wanted to murder him. They’d either come out of this arrangement as enemies (although something told him Himchan wouldn’t think of him as an enemy no matter what) or best friends. Yongguk called it 70-30, leaning towards enemies right now.

He licked at his lips because now his goddamn soulmate was drinking something horrifically sweet, and Yongguk needed it gone right now. Of course, it wasn’t his lips that needed licked to remove the taste. He tossed an arm over his head, hoping Junhong and Himchan would leave.

“Oh – oh fuck,” Himchan said, his voice sounding surprised as if he’d come to some amazing realization. Yongguk waited for him to insist he’d found a cure to cancer or thought of the lyrics to their first album or something equally impressive. “It’s your soulmate, isn’t it? I should have realized that.”

Himchan laughed, and Yongguk clenched his eyes shut, gritting his teeth because that laugh was the most obnoxious sound he’d ever heard in his life. He’d heard it for the first time when he met Himchan because Himchan made it so obnoxiously clear he talked a mile-a-minute and _never shut up_. When Yonnguk finally couldn’t take it anymore and just begged him to stop talking, Himchan just laughed, and ever since, Yongguk hated the sound.

“What’re they eating?” Himchan asked, as though Yongguk facing away from him and into the sofa wasn’t a clue that he didn’t want to talk about it.

“Fried chicken. And something sweet,” Yongguk said, hoping the answer would convince Himchan to back off. 

“Hmm, think they’re American? I think my soulmate is ‘cause whoever he is, he really likes hamburgers. I swear, I never go more than a day or two without tasting one.”

“Himchan-ssi?” Yongguk said. The formal name usually worked to make Himchan realize Yongguk wasn’t just talking for no reason. Himchan only hummed in response, quieting down. “Please stop talking and go to bed.”

“Okay, hyung.” If Yongguk realized getting Himchan to leave only required a kind order, he would have done that a long time ago (he pushed the thought of ethics and if it was okay to do that out of his head). Himchan’s footsteps faded away, and Yongguk sighed just as another cramp clenched against his stomach. Sweat beaded on his forehead, and he grimaced, hoping he’d get a little escape from the pain later tonight. 

The footsteps returned, and Yongguk didn’t even bother looking up at Himchan, knowing it had to be Himchan and hating that he wouldn’t just leave him alone.

“Here,” Himchan said. He placed something in the crook of Yongguk’s arm. “Send them a message.” Yongguk glanced at what Himchan left him, smiling as he saw it was a bottle of mouthwash and an extra cup. As Himchan walked away, Yongguk wondered why he’d never thought of that before.

“Thank you,” he said, and for once, Himchan didn’t say anything in response.  


* * *

  
The next person to join their group acted a lot more like Yongguk than Himchan. Sixteen-year-old Moon Jongup, an amazing dancer with an eye for choreography. For all his problems getting close to the group, Yongguk had no problem donning an easy professionalism. 

“Hello. Bang Yongguk,” he said with a small smile. Moon Jongup returned it and his introduction, but his voice barely rose over a whisper, and he didn’t meet Yongguk’s eyes. Yongguk wished he knew what to say to fix the awkwardness, to tell Jongup he could come to Yongguk if he had any problems, but that moved past professionalism and into a realm that Yongguk didn’t know.

The words didn’t come out, mostly because he didn’t know what the right ones were. In the end, it didn’t matter because Himchan swooped in and by the end of the second week, Himchan could make Jongup laugh with only a funny face or two.

Yongguk tried not to feel guilty that they made _him_ the leader, while all he did was hide in the studio and produce their songs. Himchan did a lot more for the entire group, which speaking of, currently meant he’d dragged Yongguk away from his equipment to watch Jongup and Junhong dance together.

Their maknaes had known each other quite well as trainees. Yongguk had known Junhong for over a year now because they’d had Yongguk work on his rapping. Junhong impressed him again and again, and he found he appreciated the relationship they’d built through working together. Yongguk knew Junhong regarded him as both a mentor and a friend, and he hoped to reach the same point with Jongup.

He just didn’t know how. While Junhong was a little shy, they also could talk about rapping for days together, and Junhong learned fast. Jongup wasn’t a rapper; he was their dancer, and Yongguk knew nothing about dance past what he’d been forced to learn as a trainee. 

“We should go out tonight,” Himchan said. “Have dinner as a group. Jongup’s been uncomfortable around everyone, and if we let him choose the place, then maybe it’ll help.”

“Sure,” he agreed because Himchan knew Jongup better than him anyway. They reached the dance studio, and Yongguk got a glimpse of Jongup in his element. Yongguk used to watch Junhong dance, mostly because Junhong never seemed to stop moving, and he used their breaks to dance out some of his energy. Jongup danced very differently than Junhong – not really better (though certainly not worse), just not the same style.

His moves were sharp, and he liked to do moves that required intense body control and complicated footwork. Yongguk hoped neither of those things transferred over into their choreography because good god, he couldn’t move like that.

“He’s amazing, isn’t he?” Himchan said, his voice just barely a whisper so as to not alert Jongup to their presence. “He’ll get embarrassed when he realizes you saw that. Don’t make it more awkward.” Easier said than done.

Junhong noticed them lingering in the doorway and paused to wave at them.

“Hey, hyungs!” he said, and Jongup stopping, spinning to look at Yongguk and Himchan. A blush crossed his face, and it surprised Yongguk just how quickly Jongup went from confident to timid. “Whatcha come over for? Want to dance with us?” Junhong grinned at them, no doubt joking because Himchan complained more about dance than anyone Yongguk had ever met, and Yongguk made it clear he danced as little as possible.

“Yongguk hasn’t seen Jongup dance before, so we wanted to stop by,” Himchan said, flashing one of his easy, wide grins. Yongguk tried to match it. He noticed Himchan dropped the honorific from his name. A couple days ago, Yongguk wouldn’t have liked that, even though he cared little for formal respect. Now though, Yongguk accepted that he and Himchan were equals, more partners than leader and dongsaeng.

“You looked really good, Jongup-ah,” he said, smiling when Jongup’s eyes met his then skirted away. “Can you show me some other stuff?” He and Himchan moved further into the studio, and Yongguk leaned against the corner of the mirror.

Jongup hesitated, and Yongguk wondered what he could possibly say to him to tell him he honestly was interested in seeing him dance more.

“You mentioned you like Chris Brown, right, Jonguppie?” Himchan jumped in, and Yongguk breathed a sigh of relief as Jongup relaxed a little more.

“Yeah, he’s really good.” Jongup’s voice still sounded timid, but this time he smiled.

“Well, I just happened to get a couple of his songs the other day. You’ll have to show me the dances.” It was all too obvious that Himchan got the songs just for Jongup, but he didn’t seem to mind, waiting for Himchan to finish connecting his phone to the stereo. 

If Yongguk had any lingering doubt Himchan was the best person ever with their dongsaengs it disappeared when the song came on because Jongup’s eyes lit up. He seemed to forget the earlier awkwardness and just go for it, his body falling into practiced moves. Junhong didn’t join him in this dance, instead coming over to stand with Yongguk and Himchan.

Jongup had such a powerful way of dancing that he made the dance seem both easy and exhausting, long and too short, all at the same time. Yongguk had met many dancers since he became a trainee, and he knew the time required to gain body control like Jongup’s. For some reason, when Yongguk pictured himself with his dongsaengs, he’d imagined him encouraging them to grow and improve. Jongup’s dance (and Junhong’s, for that matter, but Yongguk hadn’t followed this particular thought train while working only with him) far surpassed anything Yongguk could do, and he felt honestly impressed.

When Jongup finished, Yongguk smiled and told him how he recognized his hard work and was very impressed by his skill. Jongup smiled back, and Himchan’s arm wrapped around Yongguk’s shoulders. 

He realized he’d said the right thing.

“We should go out tonight,” Himchan said, his eyes glancing around to each of the members. “You pick the place, Jongup-ah.”

“Really?” Jongup said. Yongguk noticed smiles growing on both Junhong and Jongup’s faces. Once again, Himchan knew exactly what the two needed. “There’s – a burger place I’ve wanted to try. If that’s okay.” He mumbled the last bit, and Yongguk hoped Himchan didn’t show too much distaste at the thought.

Himchan tasted hamburgers all the time from his soulmate, but it seemed he was willing to taste some more for Jongup.

“Sure, sounds good. You two go shower. We’ll let Youngjae know.”  


* * *

  
The dinner went better than Yongguk originally imagined. Himchan had been right; the evening out loosened Jongup up a little. He’d also had a chance to speak with Youngjae more. He’d spoken with Youngjae when they first met, and the air of confidence around him and his talkative nature let Yongguk avoid him with more ease of conscious than the two maknaes.

Something about Youngjae, unlike the maknaes, screamed confidence, even though he acted so humble. Yongguk chalked it up to age, even though he knew it was more than that. Yongguk didn’t possess the same easy confidence as Youngjae did.

Either way, Yongguk appreciated it because for the moment, it meant he had one less member to worry about. 

He stepped into his and Himchan’s room, shrugging out of his jacket and throwing it on his bed. Someone – Himchan, most likely – followed him in and shut the door behind them.

“Yongguk, there’s a problem,” Himchan’s voice sounded strained, and Yongguk frowned, turning to look at him.

“What’s wrong?” 

“I tasted burgers tonight.” Himchan ran a hand through his hair, lifting it up and straight out of the style Yongguk watched him perfect over an hour ago. Yongguk ran his words through his head before realizing Himchan hadn’t eaten a burger; he’d eaten a salad.

“Your soulmate?” he asked, even though he knew it from the way Himchan’s eyes looked. 

“Jongup ate a burger tonight,” Himchan said. “And he told me he eats them all the time. They’re his favorite and-” His voice cracked in the middle, and he broke off, shaking his head. Yongguk noticed his hands were clenched into fists.

“Calm down,” he said, stepping towards Himchan and shoving away his awkwardness because Himchan needed him. “Here.” He guided Himchan onto the bed, sitting beside him.

“I – Yongguk – _he’s sixteen.”_ Himchan refused to look over at him, but he rubbed his face with an angry motion.

“It might not be him,” Yongguk tried. “A lot of people like burgers. It could be a coincidence.” Himchan shook his head, taking a deep, shuddering breath as he tried to stay calm.

“He got that drink. The weird fruity one. I tasted it.” 

Yongguk recalled how Himchan stuttered through the dinner, remembering how he’d found it unusual at the time, and he wondered now how the hell Himchan kept it as together as he had. Resisting the urge to groan, Yongguk considered what the best course of action would be regarding this situation.

When he accepted the leader position for B.A.P, he never thought he’d deal with a pair of soulmates within the group, and Jongup’s age greatly complicated matters. Until he reached eighteen, Jongup wouldn’t taste whatever touched Himchan’s lips, and it was highly inappropriate for Himchan to tell him they were soulmates until Jongup’s bond emerged.

Two soulmates meeting and recognizing the bond before both reached eighteen was quite rare; of course it happened to two of Yongguk’s bandmates.

“You shouldn’t tell him,” Yongguk said. “Not yet at least.”

“Of course not,” Himchan said, taking a deep breath. He leaned further into Yongguk, and for the first time, he didn’t mind Himchan’s casual touching. “I just – part of me is relieved, you know? Cause Jonguppie’s adorable and great, and I know I don’t know him well yet, but I know I want to. But – he’s young, and he’s never going to have to search for his soulmate, and what if I’m not what he wants?” 

“Channie,” Yongguk said, letting out a small chuckle and burying the surprise because where did that nickname come from? “You’re his soulmate. You’re exactly what he wants. Just – wait until he’s eighteen and knows what he wants before you tell him, okay?” The warning wasn’t necessary; they both understood Jongup needed time to mature before learning Himchan was his soulmate, but Yongguk included it anyway, just in case. Himchan didn’t comment on it, instead just nodding miserably.

“He’s five years younger than me, Yongguk,” Himchan said. “I’m – _he’s sixteen_.”

“I know, Channie,” Yongguk said. “Just – be his hyung for now. He needs you.” Himchan nodded again, taking a deep, shuddering breath. For a long pause, he said nothing. When he finally spoke again, he’d calmed enough to smile at Yongguk.

“He needs you too,” Himchan said. “They all do. Don’t underestimate yourself.” His smile still looked sad, but Yongguk accepted the change of subject.

“You’re better with them than I am,” Yongguk said with a small returning smile.

“Still, they’re your kids too.” Himchan laughed, and Yongguk felt so relieved to hear the sound that he didn’t even find it too obnoxious. “You can’t leave me to deal with them alone.”

“Can’t I just pay the child support?”

Himchan hit him in the chest, but he laughed again. Yongguk sat with Himchan on his shoulder for a while longer, until someone knocked on their door, and Himchan sat back up.

“Come in!” 

Jongup pulled the door open, smiling at them. “Would you like to watch a movie, hyungs?”

“That sounds good, Jonguppie.” Himchan smiled and jumped to his feet. Yongguk saw Himchan look at Jongup after he’d turned back around. The amount of care in his gaze shocked Yongguk. He tried to imagine a person he looked at like that, even though they ate such disgusting food all the damn time.

Yongguk couldn’t see it happening.

He followed Jongup into their living room, finding Junhong already stretched out on the floor and Youngjae curled into a ball on the sofa. Jongup flopped down with Junhong, half laying on top of him. Junhong accepted the position.

“Yongguk-hyung!” Youngjae proclaimed, grinning up at him. Seeing Youngjae smiling at him made Yongguk regret leaving him to his own devices for the past couple weeks. He needed a good leader. They all did.

“What movie do you want?” Himchan asked, focusing on Yongguk. He moved his gaze to look at everyone else.

“I’m good with anything,” he said, settling next to Youngjae and Himchan on the sofa with a small smile. 

“No, you choose, hyung,” Junhong said. “You never join us for movies so it’s your turn to pick.” Yongguk softened a little more as Junhong smiled at him. He’d apologized to Junhong once before for not knowing how to teach or explain or anything necessary to be a leader. Ever since, Junhong – fifteen-year-old Junhong with his kind heart and cute smiles – encouraged him when he stepped up and tried to reach out to his friends.

“I don’t really know anything out right now,” Yongguk said, rubbing at his hair as they scrolled through titles. “I don’t keep up on movies.”

“You’ll have to join us on more days then, hyung,” Youngjae said. “It’s criminal to not know how any of these movies.” Yongguk smiled at him, and he returned it. For all the confidence Youngjae possessed, his smile looked strangely shy and sweet. Yongguk hoped to see it again.

“I’d enjoy that,” he said. As he spoke, the taste of cheesecake appeared in his mouth, and he groaned leaning back against the couch. He’d assumed he could have one day without tasting much from his soulmate, but apparently even that was too much to ask for.

“What’s wrong, hyung?” Junhong asked. Yongguk sighed, sitting back up and finding everyone’s concerned eyes on him.

“I –” Yongguk needed to man up and tell his dongsaengs. He had no reason to keep this secret, not when it was a normal and natural thing. “My… soulmate really likes eating.” Both Jongup and Junhong stared back with wide eyes. While they knew of the bond (everyone did), it was hard to comprehend that constant connection. Himchan and Youngjae looked much more understanding.

“What are they eating?” Junhong asked. He tilted his head to the side as he spoke, propping himself onto his arms.

“Cheesecake.” Normally Yongguk would have left his answer at that, but he had the whole group’s attention, and he wanted to talk to them more and – “They eat it often. I really don’t like the taste of it.”

“Do – do you just taste it?” Jongup asked, flushing. “Sorry – if that’s a weird question.” 

“It’s not,” Himchan promised him. “And some people just taste it. Others it can affect them more. I usually just taste it.”

“Mine eats a lot,” Youngjae said. “We actually can talk through food? Like they kept eating honey and peanut butter every time I had toast and only stopped once I tried putting the honey and peanut butter on the toast.”

Yongguk nodded, accepting the tidbit of information about Youngjae. It was the first time Youngjae really offered something personal about himself, at least to Yongguk. He added it to the short list of what he knew about his group outside of their musical and performance talents.

Youngjae ate toast with peanut butter and honey most mornings.

“Have you ever met them?” Jongup asked, and Yongguk could feel the tension in Himchan next to him. Yongguk pitied his friend. They both knew it was inappropriate to tell Jongup about the soulmate bond before his side matured, but he hoped Himchan could find peace in it somehow.

“No,” Yongguk answered. “All I know about mine is they like cheesecake and anything fried.”

“It makes you sick, doesn’t it?” Junhong asked. Yongguk winced as he realized Junhong had another skill he hadn’t known about. He noticed more than the average person and much more than the average teenager his age. Yongguk nodded.

“I hate fried foods. It’s no big deal.”

“I’ve never heard of what your soulmate eating affecting you like that.” Youngjae frowned at him, shifting to sit up straighter. “Have you gotten that checked?”

“It’s no big deal. It’s just cramps.” Yongguk hadn’t planned for them to worry about him because of this. He was their leader; they shouldn’t worry about him. “I’m fine.”

Youngjae raised an eyebrow, meeting Yongguk’s gaze, but he didn’t comment. If anyone would bring it up again, it would be Himchan later. He hoped everyone just left it how it was.

“So what movie are we going to watch?”  


* * *

  
“It’s okay, Yongguk-hyung,” Youngjae said, but for once Yongguk didn’t see his easy confidence. “I – know my voice isn’t what B.A.P needs. I’m not a tenor. I can’t be the main vocalist.”

Yongguk sighed, resisting the urge to drop his head in his hands. After allowing them to believe they’d be a five-member group, their company just announced that another vocalist – a new main vocal – was joining and pushing Youngjae back into the role of lead vocal. Youngjae had worked so hard the past couple months to perfect his parts and improve his voice, and now those parts were going to another vocalist.

“You’re an amazing vocalist, Youngjae-ah,” Yongguk said because there wasn’t anything else he could say. Despite his position of leader, this decision had been over his head. He’d only found out with everyone else. “This doesn’t change that.”

“When is he coming?” Youngjae asked, changing the subject. He turned away from Yongguk, but Yongguk saw tears beginning to gather in his eyes. Yongguk swallowed down anger at their label. They weren’t a bad label; they just… hadn’t handled this well.

“Soon. Today,” Yongguk admitted. “His name’s Jung Daehyun.”

“It’s not his fault,” Youngjae said. “He must be good for them to do this. I doubt he even knows –” Yongguk hated that Youngjae, soft but sassy Youngjae who joked around all day but rarely ever offered information about his life before B.A.P, was the one insisting to Yongguk that they needed to welcome Daehyun into the group.

“I won’t let you be pushed to the background, Youngjae-ah,” Yongguk said. Though Youngjae never told him, he knew Youngjae trained at and then left JYP. Often, Yongguk heard him talking to his friends from there, calling them late at night and occasionally sounding so wistful that Yongguk almost expected him to leave and return there.

He didn’t know why Youngjae left JYP, and he wouldn’t know until Youngjae told him – if Youngjae ever told him. But he knew he’d do his best to make Youngjae feel at home in B.A.P and not regret his decision.

Yongguk just hoped he didn’t regret it already.


	2. New Introductions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daehyun arrives at the dorms and Yongguk enjoys listening to him sing. They have a conversation about cheesecake

Jung Daehyun’s arrival was surprisingly anti-climatic considering how much Yongguk had worried about it. 

Daehyun entered the dorms when Himchan was doing a short broadcast. Of all the members, Himchan had felt the most upset with TS for the sudden, unexpected addition. Yongguk wouldn’t have wanted Himchan to be the first to greet Daehyun, and as it was, he wasn’t happy with how Himchan handled it.

It wasn’t Daehyun’s fault that TS felt it necessary to add a new vocalist, but he’d talk to Himchan about that later. For now, he had to focus on making Daehyun feel welcome. 

“Hi. Bang Yongguk,” he said, bowing and donning that easy professionalism. Daehyun’s teeth bit into his large lips as he looked up at Yongguk. 

“Jung Daehyun,” Daehyun said, echoing his bow. His quiet voice and introduction made the professional part of his mind wonder how his voice would fit the role they needed, but he’s deal with that later. Yongguk frowned, wondering how best to help Daehyun considering the situation. Daehyun fidgeted in front of him, unsure of what to do now they’d been introduced. He found it hard to believe Daehyun was older than Youngjae, considering his discomfort and awkwardness compared to Youngjae’s confidence.

“Have you already put your stuff in Youngjae’s room?” Yongguk realized after he spoke that he shouldn’t have called it Youngjae’s room but correcting it would only make it worse.

“Yes,” Daehyun said. His voice had a strange quality to it. Yongguk tried to recognize what caused it, but he couldn’t place it further than just knowing Daehyun had some slight accent. He held back a frown at the new information. “Youngjae-ssi has been very kind.”

“Good,” Yongguk said. “I know this situation – isn’t the easiest, but we want you to fit in here, Daehyun-ah.” Something lit up in Daehyun’s eyes as Yongguk made an effort to reach out to him, and Yongguk felt a smile pull at his lips. Something told him that with a little time, Daehyun would work well in their group.

“Thank you, hyung.” He wondered where Daehyun was from, considering the accent as it became a little more prominent. Yongguk thought TS mentioned to him that Daehyun only moved to Seoul recently, but when the news of a new vocalist came up, he hadn’t focused on those kind of details.

“We were given the evening off; are you up for a movie?” Yongguk asked, smiling at Daehyun, who smiled a little and agreed. He took a seat on the couch, motioning Daehyun over as well.

“Have you met Jongup and Junhong?” he asked. “They’re our maknaes.” Daehyun sat down, leaving a large distance between them. His large eyes glanced at Yongguk and then at his fidgeting hands.

“Not yet,” Daehyun said. He tilted his head forward as he spoke, making his brown hair flop into his eyes. Yongguk knew they planned to bleach everyone’s hair soon, and he wondered what Daehyun would look like blonde. He wondered what Daehyun would look like when he stood next to his fellow members.

Daehyun looked tiny. He knew from his briefing that he officially was taller than Jongup, but Jongup’s sturdy form made him look larger than Daehyun. Jongup also seemed to take up more space than Daehyun. For as quiet as he was, Jongup didn't apologize for taking up space. Daehyun's hunched shoulders did. Yongguk hoped that would improve with time; they didn't need another introvert in the group.

Yongguk didn’t want to leave Daehyun alone when he seemed so out-of-place already, so he just yelled for the others to join them. Daehyun flinched back when he raised his voice, making Yongguk wish he'd done something else to summon everyone even though it was too late.

Junhong and Jongup were the first to emerge from their room and enter the living room. Jongup had clearly said something that made Junhong laugh. When they saw Daehyun on the couch, both froze, shock flickering in their eyes. Yongguk knew they’d known Daehyun was coming this evening, but they’d spent the day dancing and probably forgot.

“This is Jung Daehyun,” Yongguk said, smiling at them. “Our new vocalist.” Of course the two didn’t need that to remember who Daehyun was, but it really said something about Daehyun that Yongguk, of all people, had to step in and help the introductions go smoothly.

“Nice to meet you, Daehyun-hyung,” Junhong said, with a small bow. Daehyun rubbed his hands on his pants, clearly struggling with whether he should stand or not. “I’m Junhong.”

“You’re a rapper, right?” Daehyun asked, biting his lip again. The strange sound of it caught Yongguk again, and he racked his brain because he knew what Daehyun’s voice sounded like but couldn’t put a word to it.

“Rap and dance,” Junhong said. Yongguk appreciated his cute, comforting smiles just as much now as he did when Yongguk had only just met him and wondered how the hell he’d work with him. 

“I’m Moon Jongup – I’m dance mostly,” Jongup said. Yongguk wondered if he should correct Jongup and add vocals to his introduction, but he figured he’d let it go, glad that he introduced himself to Daehyun at least.

“Nice to meet you,” Daehyun said. For once, the maknaes sat on the sofa rather than the floor, making Daehyun scoot closer to Yongguk. He met Daehyun’s uneasy smile with his own hopefully-comforting one.

Youngjae and Himchan came out next, both smiling at Daehyun. Yongguk raised an eyebrow at Himchan, whose smile bordered on apologetic. Youngjae probably said something to him, Yongguk realized. Another wave of respect for Youngjae ran through him.

“I – apologize, Daehyun-ah,” Himchan said, his eyebrows drawing closer together as he took in Daehyun’s timid glances and fidgeting hands. “I treated you poorly earlier.”

“It’s okay, Himchan-ssi.” The use of the honorific made Himchan wince. “I know this isn’t easy for you.” He paused. “I just don’t want to mess things up for all of you.” Daehyun glanced at Yongguk as he spoke, directing the comment towards the leader. 

“You’ll only make things better, Daehyun-ah,” Yongguk said, swallowing down his own inhibitions about the situation. “You’ll see.” Daehyun thanked him, but his posture still curled in on himself, and his body language still screamed discomfort. Yongguk wished he knew how to help him more, but he figured only time could do that.

“They said you haven’t been in Seoul long, right Daehyun-hyung?” Youngjae asked, clearly intent on continuing conversation.

“I became a trainee in the beginning of the summer,” Daehyun said. “I’d only been to Seoul once before that.” Yongguk nodded, accepting the new information. It had probably come up in his briefing about Daehyun, but still, the news surprised him. Daehyun had only trained with TS for a few months, then was placed with them. He must be damn good for TS to do that.

“Busan, right?” Himchan asked. Daehyun deflated even more at that, and Daehyun’s accent clicked for Yongguk just as Himchan said it.

“You can tell?” Daehyun said, slumping forward and sounding defeated. “I’m supposed to hide the accent.”

“We’re not on camera now,” Junhong pointed out, tilting his head at Daehyun. “Why hide it?”

“I know but – I just – I’m not supposed to sound like this.” Yongguk liked his normal voice better, he decided, accent or not. Removing the fake Seoul accent from his voice made him sound more natural and already more confident.

“Daehyun-ah,” Yongguk said, waiting until Daehyun met his eyes to continue. He kept a light smile on his face. “You don’t have to pretend here. Once we debut, we’re going to be on camera all the time and have to pretend all the time. Don’t pretend when you’re off camera too.”

“And definitely not to us,” Youngjae said, jumping in. “We’re going to be your closest friends.” Youngjae had a wide smile on, and Daehyun’s lips twitched into what Yongguk thought had to be the first real smile he’d seen from Daehyun.

He straightened up in his seat a little. “Thank you,” he said, and he looked straight into Yongguk’s eyes as he did. Yongguk swallowed, pushing down all the thoughts bubbling up in him that wanted him to protect Daehyun from everything and everyone who wanted him to be something he wasn’t. “That’s – a relief.”

“Now, movie time?” Himchan suggested. “You pick, Daehyun-ah. And pick anything you want. Yongguk hasn’t seen anything so we’re trying to educate him.” Yongguk rolled his eyes at his friend, but he smiled once again when Daehyun hesitantly said a title he didn’t recognize. Whatever it was had to be popular because both Junhong and Jongup cheered at the title, and their encouragement made Daehyun smile again.

Yongguk thought this might work out after all.  


* * *

  
Daehyun had a beautiful voice. TS had waited so long to put another vocalist in with them that deciding to add Daehyun now meant he must be amazing. Yongguk knew that.  
Somehow, Daehyun’s voice still surprised him.

When Yongguk asked to watch his vocal practice, Daehyun had blushed and nodded in the timid way Yongguk was beginning to associate with him since meeting him the day before. He’d taken a seat in the corner of the room, waiting while Daehyun ran through a few warm-ups. He glanced at Yongguk every so often as though apologetic about the time it took him to warm up.

Yongguk smiled at him every time he felt Daehyun’s eyes on him, otherwise working on lyric ideas in his notebook. His stomach growled, and Yongguk frowned, the sound reminding him how he hadn’t tasted much of anything from his soulmate in days. He hoped whoever they were, they were okay and tried to bury the anxiety that wanted to bubble up and insist something must be wrong with them.

Then Daehyun began to really sing, and everything he’d been thinking about flew from his head because Daehyun’s voice was powerful and loud and not at all what Yongguk expected but exactly what he knew they needed. 

The door to the studio opened, and Yongguk glanced away from Daehyun to see Youngjae walking in. Daehyun looked over at him and his voice faltered, but Youngjae only smiled and motioned for him to go on.

“He’s great, isn’t he?” Youngjae said, his voice quiet so as to not disturb Daehyun. He leaned on the wall next to Yongguk’s seat. Yongguk nodded, finding he couldn’t take his eyes off Daehyun as he sung. “I thought I’d feel jealous, you know? But – I don’t. He’s good at all the stuff I struggled with, and that means I can focus on the stuff I like.” Youngjae sounded a little surprised with himself, but his words made Yongguk smile.

Youngjae always recognized his own limitations. In the past couple months, that meant he repeated high notes over and over, only stopping when his voice couldn’t handle the notes without cracking and breaking through them. Himchan brought up anxiety over him damaging his voice multiple times, but they all knew how important it was to have a strong vocalist, and Youngjae had to hit those notes.

Youngjae hated singing like a tenor. Yongguk had watched him change song after song to fit his natural range when he wasn’t practicing and just singing for himself. Their debut forced him into the role of a tenor, and in retrospect, it seemed obvious to Yongguk that Youngjae would find having Daehyun in the group as a relief rather than something more negative.

“He’s scared of me though,” Youngjae continued. “Thinks I’m going to hate him because of it all. If you don’t mind, hyung, I think I’m going to take him out to dinner tonight, try and get to know him a little. Right now it seems like he thinks I’m going to kill him overnight.” Yongguk nodded his approval, letting out a little hum to show he was listening even though he kept his eyes on Daehyun.

He felt Youngjae’s quizzical glance and looked away from Daehyun, back down to his notebook. Yongguk felt Youngjae lean over to glance at his work. He hadn’t done anything serious, only scrawled a few words down and made a rhyme or too. Yongguk wasn’t even quite sure what he’d written.

“Oh,” Youngjae said, surprise and amusement coloring his voice. He chuckled, a smile pulling at his lips. “I didn’t expect that.” Before Yongguk could ask what he meant, Daehyun hit a breath-taking high note and finished.

He turned to look at Yongguk and Youngjae. “What did you think?” he asked, focusing the words at Yongguk even as his eyes glanced over to Youngjae. Daehyun knew he’d sung the song better than Youngjae could; anyone knew that because their voices were so different, and the song so clearly fit Daehyun better than Youngjae. 

“That was great,” Yongguk told him. He’d never been one to give over-the-top praise, but much like with Junhong and Jongup’s dancing, Yongguk accepted singing wasn’t his strong point. He was at ease just telling Daehyun and Youngjae that they impressed him and leaving the technical coaching to their vocal coaches.

Daehyun beamed at him, accepting the praise. His eyes skirted over to Youngjae again, and Youngjae’s wide smile only made Daehyun look even happier. Yongguk wondered how different Daehyun would act once he got comfortable with the fact that they didn’t hate him for joining their group. He hoped he’d get to see it soon. Already his smile alone had Yongguk’s heart pounding and his chest filling with happiness. 

Of course, that only happened because he wanted to see his dongsaengs succeed.

Youngjae stepped forward to let Daehyun know his plans for the evening, and Yongguk said a quick goodbye and made his way back into his own studio to work on some other lyrics. He glanced down to his notebook, remembering Youngjae’s comment. 

Frowning, he reread the words he’d written during Daehyun’s song and oh – Yongguk understood Youngjae’s amusement because his words were all about big eyes that showed you everything someone couldn’t say with words.

Yongguk pursed his lips, considering the words and Daehyun because these things didn’t just happen to him. But – he found an easy explanation. Daehyun’s eyes were beautiful and big and said a lot. Anyone could see that. It didn’t mean much for him to focus on that while writing. Considering their company's recent request for a love song, Yongguk thought it was a good thing he'd noticed Daehyun's eyes. Inspiration comes from everywhere, after all.

He wrote for a while longer then moved to his computer as his lyrical ideas ran dry so he could focus on mixing music instead. At some point, he began to taste fried chicken, and though he rolled his eyes, he also smiled because that proved his soulmate was safe somewhere. 

He was about thirty minutes into the normal cramps when Himchan came into the studio. Seeing him hunched over at his computer, Himchan set the food he’d brought down on the side. Even though he knew he’d regret it, Yongguk pulled his headphones out, facing Himchan and raising an eyebrow.

“Soulmate trouble?” he asked, taking a seat next to Yongguk, who nodded and grunted an answer. “You should take a break if it’s hurting.”

“I need to get this done.”

“Have you eaten anything all day?” Himchan said, ignoring his last statement. Yongguk didn’t bother to reply; they both already knew the answer. Himchan sighed, and Yongguk tried to just ignore him because he was an adult, and Himchan didn’t have to baby him. “I brought you food.” He looked back at the computer.

“No,” Yongguk said, not looking away from his work even though he couldn’t do much without his headphones. “Not now.” 

“You need to eat,” Himchan said, stubborn. “I brought ramen.” Yongguk shook his head, moving to put his headphones back on. Himchan stopped him, grabbing his wrist. “You need to eat something.”

Yongguk sighed, realizing Himchan wasn’t about to drop the conversation. “Something small. And something simple.” Himchan beamed at him, and Yongguk snorted but couldn’t help smiling back at his friend.

“I brought plain bread.” Himchan pulled out a loaf of bread from the bag, and Yongguk raised his eyebrows. “You can’t get simpler than that. I’ve got butter and peanut butter too. Even brought honey, just in case Youngjae’s gotten you in that habit too.”

“Thanks, Channie,” Yongguk said with a small laugh. “I’ll at least put some butter on it though.” He stood to do it, but Himchan waved him away, buttering his bread for him. Yongguk wanted to laugh at his overbearing friend, but he couldn’t deny he appreciated the effort. 

“Here you go, Bbang!” 

“Bbang?” he questioned, taking a bite. Himchan buttered another piece for himself.

“Mhmm. It’s a good nickname.” Yongguk shrugged, not sure what to say about Himchan deciding to call him bread. “You’re right. It’s the _greatest_ nickname.”

When Yongguk returned to the dorm that night, he expected everyone to already be asleep, but the sound of soft laughter proved him wrong. He opened Youngjae’s door – Youngjae and Daehyun’s door, he corrected, curious as to what they were doing. 

Inside, the two were just sitting and talking, and Daehyun laughed again, his eyes bright with a happiness Yongguk was seeing for the first time but would get to know quite well. When he noticed Yongguk, he cut off, scrambling to stand up and greet Yongguk, but Yongguk stopped him by holding up a hand.

“Just checking in,” he said. “Make sure you get enough sleep.”  


* * *

  
“I thought being his soulmate would be a lot harder,” Himchan admitted, nodding his head towards the maknaes’ room, where they knew Jongup slept. “I was worried I’d start feeling like – like _you know_ – about him. But I really just want to take care of him.”

Yongguk understood what Himchan meant. In the past couple weeks, he’d watched Himchan help Jongup with anything and everything he possibly needed. 

“You want to give him every burger he could ever ask for,” Yongguk said dryly, knowing Himchan had taken Jongup out for hamburgers often in the past few weeks. Himchan grinned and shrugged, not shy at all about it.

“I just – want him to be happy.”

“He’s lucky to have you,” Yongguk said with a small smile. His thoughts turned to his own soulmate. Their eating habits had changed dramatically over the past few weeks, and they ate much less than before. Yongguk hoped (in the most hypocritical way possible) they got enough food every day. He just hoped they were okay.

“I think Youngjae might know,” Himchan said, pursing his lips as he thought. Yongguk glanced up, alarmed. “He’s really clever. Surprises me sometimes.”

“How would he know?” Yongguk asked. He’d decided before that the best way to deal with Himchan’s situation was to not talk about it in front of the other members. Sure, he trusted them but this was an important secret, and news traveled fast once too many people knew.

“I always brush my teeth right after I take Jongup out. I think he noticed and considering how much I used to complain about burgers…” Himchan trailed off, shrugging. Yongguk grimaced.

“It’s okay,” Yongguk said. “Just – be careful, okay?”

“Of course.” Himchan sighed, and Yongguk regretted berating Himchan about it. He knew Himchan cared about Jongup more than anything and would never do anything to hurt him. “It’s good to see Daehyun settling in well.”

Yongguk smiled at the new train of thought. Though Daehyun remained somewhat shy around him, he’d opened up to the other members a lot. In the process, he’d no doubt become Youngjae’s best friend, which was something Youngjae desperately had needed. 

Yongguk hadn’t heard him use that wistful tone when talking to his JYP friends ever since he’d grown closer to Daehyun, and it seemed that every day Daehyun laughed a little louder and smiled a little brighter. He hadn’t noticed day-to-day, but comparing Daehyun to how he’d been two weeks ago made them seem like totally different people.

They’d begun to learn the choreography to “Warrior,” and he’d seen Daehyun trying Junhong’s rap and laughing when he couldn’t during their breaks. At one point, he’d succeeded, and immediately turned to Youngjae, and they started jumping around and cheering and hitting each other excitedly. Yongguk had just watched it happen, shocked by Daehyun’s loud, cheerful laughter and even by Youngjae’s clear excitement.

“He got so excited when he did Junhong’s rap,” Himchan continued, a smile growing on his face. “Did you see that?” Yongguk nodded, his own smile growing to match Himchan’s.

“It’s nice to see him opening up,” he said. “Hopefully he continues to.”

“Famous last words,” a voice said from behind the couch, and Yongguk jumped even as he recognized Youngjae’s voice. “Talking about us, hyungs?” Youngjae grinned as both Yongguk and Himchan spun around, seeing him standing in the hallway with Daehyun.

He came over to the couch while Daehyun lingered behind him, hesitating for another moment before sitting next to Youngjae.

“Why aren’t you asleep? We have a lot to do tomorrow.” Himchan asked. Youngjae shrugged.

“Why aren’t you?”

“You’re the one who needs beauty sleep, hyung.” Daehyun’s voice still sounded hesitant, and Yongguk knew he shouldn’t support his members insulting each other, but Daehyun’s sweet voice combined with the utter shock on Himchan’s face made him laugh. Youngjae joined in, smacking Himchan once or twice because Youngjae handled amusement violently.

Himchan shoved him off, looking offended in such an over-the-top way that it had to be a joke. “Yoo Youngjae! I know this is your fault. He seemed so sweet before, and look what you did to him!”

“I’m right here, hyung,” Daehyun said, giggling. 

“You know what we were saying about you opening up?” Himchan asked him. Daehyun nodded, a wide smile across his lips. “I take it back. I liked you better when you didn’t talk.” Daehyun laughed again.

“Sorry, hyung,” he said, not sounding apologetic at all. “People actually tell me I talk too much a lot.” 

“They’re right,” Youngjae said, and his dry tone shocked Yongguk a little. He’d watched Youngjae and Daehyun’s relationship grow but much of progress happened late at night in their room, and this was the first time he got to see the two interacting during their free time. “He never stops talking. Usually about food.”

“Food is important! And I’m going through cheesecake withdrawals.”

“Should I even ask?” Himchan asked. Yongguk watched Daehyun gesture and smile as he jumped into telling Himchan about cheesecake, of all things.

“I take my cheesecake very seriously,” he said. “My grandma made the best cheesecake and even when I moved here there was this place right by the trainee’s dorms. Now, there’s _nothing_.”

“I know, it’s devastating.” Youngjae wiped a fake tear from his face as he spoke, and Daehyun smacked his shoulder.

“Only good thing about it is my soulmate isn’t mad at me anymore.” Daehyun laughed, his eyes crinkling with amusement. “They started drinking mouthwash anytime I ate some.”

“They probably realize you’ll never love anyone as much as you love cheesecake.” Youngjae jerked away to avoid Daehyun hit him again. Both laughed, and Yongguk wondered when their relationship became so violent.

“Maybe your soulmate is like Bbang,” Himchan said. “He gets cramps from his soulmate.” Yongguk felt his face heat up as Daehyun turned to look at him, concern evident in his wrinkled forehead and small frown.

“I didn’t know that was a thing,” Daehyun said. His frown lightened. “If it is, at least now I’m not bothering them as much. I eat totally different here.”

Yongguk’s soulmate had also changed their diet recently. He frowned, his heart speeding up as he looked at Daehyun. Then he mentally rolled his eyes. That was stupid. With seven billion people on the world, his soulmate couldn’t be Daehyun. Coincidences happen.

“It’s not too bad,” Yongguk said, shrugging. “It lets me know they’re okay, at least.”

“That’s good. I worry about mine sometimes. They hardly ever eat.”


	3. Youngjae Knows

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A couple months after their debut, Yongguk struggles with the idea that Daehyun might just be his soulmate. Youngjae knows and refuses to let it go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone! Thank you so much for all the positive feedback I've received so far for this fic! I'm really grateful to anyone who left kudos or a comment. Feedback really does make my day.\

Yongguk had spent enough time around Daehyun to know right now he’d be in the bathroom brushing his teeth. He knew it for sure, but not because Daehyun was a fan of routine; their lives didn’t allow for that anyway. No, Yongguk knew he’d be brushing his teeth from the taste of mint in his own mouth.

Daehyun – tiny, loud Daehyun who went from scared to introduce himself to talking about everything all the time – was his soulmate. Yongguk didn’t know whether the turning in his stomach came from excitement or dismay. He had always wondered about his soulmate; who didn’t, after all?

And – as was the point of soulmates – Yongguk couldn’t deny the spark he felt around Daehyun. He’d never been prone to denial; Yongguk liked the face the world and the cards he’d been dealt.

Fate dealt him Daehyun, but it also dealt him contracts and the public eye. Their industry profited off making fans believe in maybes. They’d already done a photo shoot where he, Himchan, Daehyun and Youngjae – the members old enough for mature soulmate bonds – posed with different foods and took pictures that ended up with captions like “What have you tasted today?”

Idols promised to donate their lives to their fans, and he’d watched idols lose their entire careers after announcing they’d found their soulmates. B.A.P already had two members of six who’d struggle to hide their love for the benefit of their careers.

If he and Daehyun pursued any relationship outside the normal one between bandmates, then B.A.P would only have two members who didn’t have to constantly hide their soulmate bonds. Sure, idols found their soulmates as they got older, but B.A.P had only just debuted. Less than a year old, and only two of their members could honestly talk about their potential soulmates without lying.

Yongguk couldn’t see that ending well, and as B.A.P’s leader, he couldn’t let his group fall apart. Sometimes leaders had to make hard decisions. His involved brushing his teeth only when he knew Daehyun was asleep and sticking to bland food that Daehyun wouldn’t notice over what he chose during any meal they happened to eat together.

It also involved a creeping loneliness that he couldn’t shove down for the life of him. 

But for now, he could handle that by casting his thoughts away and focusing on his group. He stared at the blank page in front of him, knowing he couldn’t sleep yet but also knowing the only lyrics coming to him were sad and not what B.A.P could sing.

“So any more soulmate trouble?” Youngjae lounged on the couch, his knees bent over its arm as he peered at Yongguk from his back. He hadn’t yet removed his makeup from their performance and was waiting while Daehyun showered. Yongguk shook his head, fiddling with his notebook as he tried to think of lyrics. “You sure? Nothing wrong last night?”

“What are you talking about, Youngjae?” Yongguk kept his voice calm and even. He knew Youngjae well enough to realize he possessed a wicked ability to reason through problems, and recently, he’d found Youngjae had no worries about sticking his nose into other people’s business. Include the business of Yongguk’s soulmate.

Yongguk fiddled with his pen, drawing a star in the corner of the page. He hoped the illusion of him getting work done would stop Youngjae, but Youngjae knew him well enough to know if he actually was busy with lyrics then he’d be in the studio, not their living room.

“Dae went out for cheesecake yesterday, wanted to make sure it didn’t make you sick.” 

Yongguk took a deep breath. In the past month or so, Youngjae had become set on the idea that Yongguk and Daehyun were soulmates. He’d figured it out only a couple days after Yongguk had, to his annoyance. Yongguk sighed, looking up from his notebook and closing it. 

“Youngjae-ah,” he said, using (abusing?) his leader voice and meeting Youngjae’s eyes as he spoke. “Daehyun and I are not soulmates. You need to let this go.” Youngjae met his gaze casually, raising an eyebrow so it disappeared under his blonde bangs.

“Dae told me the only thing he’ll ever love more than us is his soulmate. And you _know_ , but you aren’t telling him.” The hurt in his voice and in his eyes made Yongguk need to look away. “It’s awful keeping this secret for you, hyung.”

He wanted to tell Youngjae there was no way he and Daehyun were soulmates. He wanted to tell Youngjae no one told him to figure the secret out in the first place.

“I know – just, not now.” He couldn’t lie to Youngjae.

“Do it soon,” Youngjae advised. “Because you’re avoiding Daehyun, and everyone sees it. Even the fans have noticed. You need to fix this.”

Yongguk wonders how they’ve become this in only a couple months. Before, Youngjae never would have dared to speak to him like that, keeping his observations in the background and letting things go with a roll of his eyes. He wondered if Youngjae getting to know him caused the change, or if Youngjae just cared that much about Daehyun.

Yongguk would have expected this sort of conversation from Himchan, but hearing it from Youngjae was… jarring, to say the least.

“We already have one pair of soulmates hiding in this group.” Youngjae lowered his voice, even though they both knew the others were too far to hear them. “Don’t make it two.” Yongguk didn’t have it in him to act surprised that Youngjae knew about Himchan and Jongup.

Himchan never tried too hard to hide his absolute love for Jongup.

“I get why hyung has to hide it,” Youngjae said. He brushed his hair back to focus both eyes on Yongguk. “But you – why are you hiding it? Doesn’t it make you happy?” 

“We’re too busy, and what would we do?” Yongguk sighed. “It’s not like we can actually be together.” Youngjae looked away. They didn’t often speak about how their contracts dealt with soulmates. It tended to go unspoken, a downside to their contracts that they knew was terrible but was also something every idol had to put up with.

Youngjae set his jaw, taking a deep breath. 

“They don’t prohibit them. The contracts, I mean.” Youngjae looked up again, and this time his gaze looked hard. He kept his eyes up, meeting Yongguk’s. “I know they don’t prohibit soulmate interaction.”

Yongguk hadn’t known that. Their company frowned upon soulmates – the entire industry did – Yongguk hadn’t known the exact language in their contracts.

“JYP’s did,” Youngjae said. Yongguk tried to hold back his surprise at Youngjae’s mention of his old company. He nodded, waiting for Youngjae to go on. “I thought it wasn’t a big deal at first, you know? But then my – my soulmate tried so hard to talk to me, and – I realized I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t stay under that contract. It’s supposed to be better here, hyung; don’t do this.”

Youngjae’s earnest eyes hurt Yongguk even more than his slumped posture as he admitted the real reason he’d left JYP. Of all the members, he struggled to understand how to treat Youngjae. Technically, Youngjae was in the maknae line, not that much older than Jongup, but sometimes, like now, he spoke with more wisdom and more articulately than Yongguk ever expected from an nineteen-year-old. Other times, he revealed how much he didn’t know.

If Youngjae thought a small contract difference would change how their soulmate situations were handled, he would struggle a lot in the future. TS may not directly prohibit them to talk with their soulmates, but companies had many ways to control idols without ever straight up citing them for breaking their contracts. 

Yongguk hated how easy it was to imagine a younger – though not by much because god, he was still so young - Youngjae seeing TS’ contracts and comparing them to JYP’s, intent on finding a way to be an idol but not give up his unknown soulmate in the process. He could see him finding the slight difference in wording and latching onto it.

Sometimes the words in a contract mattered less than what the company wanted from those under contract, but Youngjae had been too young to know that, too set on believing the world was a fair place, that their companies would never want to hurt them. 

Against all odds, Yongguk hoped Youngjae was right about TS, but he also had to be realistic.

Yongguk sighed, taking a seat on the couch and nudging Youngjae’s feet away from him. Youngjae swung up to sit next to him. 

“Announcing a soulmate can ruin your career, Youngjae-ah. It’s a lot more than just a contract. If we – if Himchan and Jongup announced that – it could ruin all our careers.”

“I’m not saying you tell the world, hyung,” Youngjae said, seeing straight through Yongguk’s attempt to focus on Himchan and Jongup rather than himself and Daehyun. “Just Daehyun. You need to tell Daehyun.” Before Yongguk had a chance to respond, the bathroom door opened, and Daehyun came out wearing only a tank top and boxers.

“Youngjae! Shower’s free – oh hi, hyung.” Youngjae stood, walking over to his room to grab his stuff for the shower. Daehyun beamed at him, coming over to sit where Youngjae had just moments before. “I thought you’d be in the studio tonight.” Yongguk shook his head, looking anywhere but at Daehyun. He pretended he didn’t see Daehyun deflate at how Yongguk passed him over.

He averted his eyes back towards the hallway and saw Youngjae reemerged from his room. He looked over the two on the couch, a towel tucked under his arm. “Good. You need to talk.” Yongguk hated how smug he sounded.

“About what?” Daehyun asked, wrinkles appearing on his face as he turned and frowned at Youngjae. Yongguk tried not to notice how the motion moved Daehyun closer to him and how he felt the heat coming off Daehyun’s body, which was still red from his shower.

“Hyung will tell you.” Then Youngjae went into the bathroom, shutting the door behind him with a firm bang. Yongguk took a deep breath, turning back to see Daehyun’s eyes on him.

“What do you need to tell me, hyung?” He considered telling him; he really did. But with Daehyun’s eyes on his own, and his heart pounding in his chest, he only muttered a quick excuse. Without a coat, without even his phone, Yongguk walked out of the dorms, his notebook under his arm and an escape to the studio on his mind.

Behind him, Daehyun stared after him, chewing at his lip and staring at the closed door as though it could explain everything to him. He hadn’t moved by the time Youngjae got out of the shower.  


* * *

  
“Bbang’s soulmate gives him the most trouble!” Himchan said with a wide grin. Yongguk regretted hiding what he knew from Himchan as he spoke into the microphone. The interviewer nodded, and Yongguk kept his gaze straight ahead and kept his normal smile on for the camera. “If Yongguk’s soulmate is listening, then try not to eat so much cheesecake and chicken. You give him cramps!”

Of course, Himchan didn’t know it, but Yongguk’s soulmate definitely heard that. Daehyun frowned, glancing at Yongguk, who avoided his gaze. He felt Youngjae’s eyes burning into the back of his head and considered it a small victory that he didn’t turn to glance up at him.

“Yongguk-ssi, do you always get cramps from your soulmate?” the interviewer asked. She frowned at him, as though honestly concerned for his well-being.

“Not usually,” he said, forcing a smile. “Fried chicken and cheesecake bother me. My soulmate doesn’t eat either often though.”

“But they used to,” Youngjae added. Yongguk turned to look at him. “Before we debuted it happened a lot.”

“Well, I’m glad it doesn’t happen anymore!” The interview continued, but Yongguk couldn’t hear anything over his heart pounding in his ears. He felt Daehyun’s gaze burning into his side and refused to look at him. Daehyun stayed silent for the rest of the interview as well, but Yongguk tried to push that off as Daehyun attempting to act out his supposedly quiet and mysterious personality.

Yongguk still hated that TS wanted Daehyun to hide his accent, and he hated even more that they wanted him to pretend he didn’t talk much at all. But he only had so much say in matters, and Daehyun usually just shrugged it off when he asked about it and kept on going.

Yongguk personally thought the “quiet and mysterious” act wouldn’t last for too long.

After the interview, they headed home. With the (pathetic) excuse of “leader business,” he evaded Daehyun’s attempts to corner him until late that evening, when Daehyun knocked on his studio door before inviting himself in and taking a seat in his extra chair.

“It’s late, Daehyun-ah. You shouldn’t be up. We have another interview tomorrow.” Yongguk wasn’t lying. If he had his way, then Daehyun would be tucked into bed and sleeping right now. But that wasn’t what Daehyun came to the studio to hear. His eyes looked wild, glancing at Yongguk and then away. His hands were cupped around a coffee, but Yongguk hadn’t tasted him drinking it yet.

“I brought this for you,” Daehyun said, holding out the coffee. Yongguk was close enough to see him swallow after he spoke. He reached out and took it, brushing his fingers against Daehyun’s and ignoring how his heart jumped at the contact.

Yongguk had avoided touching Daehyun in the months after their debut, shying away from the casual arm he tended to swing over his friends’ shoulders. Daehyun had always seemed to shrug it off as Yongguk just being himself; after all, Yongguk never initiated skinship with any member.

“Try it,” Daehyun said. He clamped his hands together on his lap, pressing his fingers together until Yongguk saw white around the edges of them. His tense body betrayed his casual tone. If Yongguk took a sip of the coffee, both of them would taste it.

“I’m not really –”

“Try it, hyung.” Daehyun’s eyes didn’t leave his face. Yongguk tried to calm his heart before acquiescing and taking a sip of the coffee. He stared into Daehyun’s eyes as he took it, seeing the way he clenched his jaw when bitterness ran down Yongguk’s throat. Yongguk lowered the coffee as Daehyun nodded, one, twice, a couple more times. Daehyun took a shuddering breath.

“I – thought it was you,” he said. “But you stopped talking to me. Am I really that bad, hyung?” His shoulders shook, and he clenched his hands even harder. 

Yongguk had expected yelling. Daehyun often overreacted to scenarios, yelling and hitting Youngjae for his sarcasm or collapsing into laughter after one of Jongup’s stranger comments. He didn’t do emotionless. Daehyun came with strong emotions in the same way Yongguk came with an almost unnerving calm. 

Yongguk hated the mask TS asked Daehyun to wear because it attempted to turn Daehyun’s personality backwards and upside down for the camera. Despite all Daehyun’s efforts, it was falling because the real Jung Daehyun couldn’t stop talking and couldn’t stop laughing and couldn’t stop just being himself.

Yongguk loved that about him. He’d learned to appreciate the people whose smiles could light up a whole room, and Daehyun’s certainly qualified. Yongguk spent a lot of time pretending the sound of Daehyun’s laugh didn’t make his heart fill his chest with happiness. 

“It’s not you, Daehyun,” Yongguk said. “You’re fine.” The comment sounded wrong even to him, but Daehyun only nodded again. Yongguk tried to tell if he was angry or sad or _anything_ but for the first time since he’d begun to realize Daehyun wasn’t some shy introvert, he couldn’t read his face or his voice. Daehyun just looked like he accepted it. Like he’d given up.

Yongguk thought that was even worse than if Daehyun had started yelling.

“Right, I’ll let you get back to work.” Daehyun stood, turning from Yongguk, who still clutched the coffee in his hand. Yongguk took a deep breath, watching Daehyun leave the studio.

“Wait.” Daehyun stopped, his hand on the door handle. He turned his head to look back at Yongguk. Yongguk saw his shoulders tense. “Stay for a while.” Yongguk finally set down the coffee, but he couldn’t make himself reach out towards Daehyun.

Yongguk was lucky Daehyun was so forgiving. He took the same seat as before, running his hands along his pants even as his eyes stayed on Yongguk’s face. 

“Did you really think I hadn’t noticed? You either can’t look at me or can’t stop looking at me whenever I eat anything. Is being my soulmate really that disappointing?” 

“No,” Yongguk said immediately. He swallowed, trying to work out what else to say. “I just – don’t want to ruin things.” Daehyun laughed, but it wasn’t the right laugh. Yongguk liked the barking laughter that flew out of him whenever he was surrounded by friends and didn’t care what anyone else thought. This laughter sounded sharp and bitter, and the sound of it hurt Yongguk.

“Ruin what? Our careers? I would have thought you, of everyone, would have realized there’s more important things.”

“We’re a new group, Daehyun-ah. We can’t mess things up before we really start.” His breath caught as Daehyun leaned closer, reaching out with a hesitant hand before running it through Yongguk’s hair. Daehyun paused, eye flicking to meet his and his tongue moving over dry lips, but Yongguk didn’t move, closing his eyes and trying to just breathe.

“This isn’t about the group though, and we aren’t talking about announcing to the world that we’re soulmates. We’re just talking about us.” Yongguk could feel his breath hitting against his face as he spoke. It smelled like mint. He recalled tasting a breath mint not too long ago.

“I don’t want things to be complicated.”

“Things are already complicated, hyung. Himchan’s going to tell Jongup the minute he turns eighteen, you know that. What makes us different than them?” Yongguk opened his eyes, frowning because goddamn did everyone know about Himchan and Jongup? Daehyun chuckled, and the sound sent a shiver down Yongguk’s back. “I’m not oblivious, hyung. And I’m not _stupid_. I have eyes.”

“I’m the leader. I can’t – just do stuff like this.” Yongguk’s excuse sounded weak to his own ears, and Daehyun heard the same thing. His lips twitched into a small smirk, leaving Yongguk to wonder where this side of Daehyun even came from.

“You make spending time with your soulmate sound scandalous.” He sounded much too amused, smiling even wider when Yongguk couldn’t think of a good answer. “Come on,” he said. “We’re going out to dinner.”

“It’s late,” Yongguk protested, glancing back towards his computer.

“That doesn’t stop you usually, and I know for a fact that you haven’t eaten since before the interview.” Daehyun opened the studio door, looking back at Yongguk and smiling at him. His heart jumped to attention at the sight. “You’re paying. I’ve waited long enough for my soulmate to finally take me out for cheesecake.”

“You do realize that makes me sick, right?” Yongguk said standing and letting Daehyun hold the door for him.

“Hush, you always say you don’t mind. This time I’m just going to believe you.” Daehyun paused, dipping his head to the side before his face lit up. “Do you think if I take the pain medicine it’ll work?” Yongguk shook his head, smiling because no, that wasn’t how it worked at all. Daehyun slipped his hand into Yongguk’s looking up with a question burning in his eyes.

Yongguk nodded. Hand holding was okay.

Over two hours later, Daehyun would pull Yongguk into a pharmacy by the hand, telling him he didn’t want to cause him pain anymore, and that if Yongguk wasn’t so stubborn, he would have realized long ago that there was over-the-counter medicine for soulmate cramps.  


* * *

  
“Who do you think will realize first?” Daehyun asked, leaning against the couch and slipping a hand into Yongguk’s. Yongguk raised an eyebrow at him. “You’re right. Youngjae. The real question is will Himchan or Jongup realize last. I say Jongup; he doesn’t get as embarrassed about staring at Himchan so he looks away less.”

“I vote same time,” a voice came from behind them. “If you two keep being this obvious, even Jongup will see it soon. And that’s saying something considering how he still looked surprised when Himchan called him his favorite.” 

Yongguk didn’t even have it in him to be surprised about Youngjae eavesdropping from behind their couch. Daehyun spun around with a surprised “yah,” but Yongguk only shook his head and chuckled.

“How much time do you spend waiting back there, just to jump into conversations?” he asked. Youngjae ignored him, instead grinning at the two of them and moving over to see their entwined hands.

“Fucking finally. Now I don’t have to spend money taking Daehyun out for food to make you constipated.”

“I thought you liked spending time with me!” Daehyun protested, clearly offended by Youngjae’s comment. Youngjae didn’t seem to notice, letting out a loud laugh as he threw himself onto the couch with them, clapping and laughing and showing his happiness by hitting everyone and everything, as usual.

“Youngjae-ah!” Daehyun yelled, laughing even as he released Yongguk’s hand to shove Youngjae off them. Yongguk slid away as they started wrestling, only jumping in to save them both when Daehyun almost threw them off the couch. 

Finally, gasping with desperate giggles, Daehyun sat on Youngjae’s hips, victorious. 

“Take it back!” he demanded. “You love spending time with me.” They all knew Daehyun’s words were true; Youngjae and Daehyun were best friends. The two spent every available moment annoying each other or laughing with each other or – most commonly – annoying the other members and laughing about that. But of course Youngjae wouldn’t admit that.

“Never! I only did it cause you two needed help. You should be thanking me!” He struggled to overturn Daehyun, who’d pinned his arms down on either side of his head. Yongguk watched them, liking the way Daehyun’s entire face seemed to crinkle into a smile. He began to tickle Youngjae, who thrashed around enough that Yongguk had to go and help hold him down.

Otherwise Youngjae could have hurt himself. He needed Yongguk to hold him down, for his own protection.

“Hyungs?” Junhong’s voice sounded both amused and confused as he took in the sight of Youngjae pinned to the couch by both Daehyun and Yongguk, crying with laughter as both tickled him. They stopped, letting Youngjae catch his breath and collapse back against the couch with exhaustion. “Is everything okay?”

Yongguk let out another chuckle. Sometimes he thought Junhong was the most normal of the group. But then again, sometimes Junhong danced until two in the morning, his movements becoming stranger and stranger until Yongguk peaked in and just saw him flailing around and laughing.

“We’re fine, Junhong-ah,” Daehyun said.

“It’s not fine! Save me, Junhong!” Youngjae still sounded out of breath, and Daehyun pushed down the arm Youngjae extended out towards Junhong down, leading to more wrestling. Yongguk took a step back as Junhong joined the battle, pulling Daehyun off Youngjae so he could escape.

“I knew you were my favorite for a reason, Junhong,” Youngjae said, wrapping an arm around his shoulder and glaring at the others. He made a show of leaning against Junhong for support, and Junhong just rolled his eyes and wrapped an arm around Youngjae’s waist. “We should leave and start our own group, Junhong-ah. Soulmates make things way too complicated.”

He tried to pull Junhong away with him, but Junhong had frozen, his eyes flicking between Daehyun and Yongguk. “Soulmates?” he echoed. Despite not being ashamed of Daehyun, Yongguk found himself unable to think of the words to answer Junhong, only nodding with a wide smile on his face.

But that’s why Daehyun was such a good fit for him. Daehyun knew exactly how to tell Junhong.

“That’s us,” he said with one of his bright smiles, grabbing Yongguk’s hand and rising onto his toes to kiss Yongguk on the cheek. Yongguk pulled away, flushing when Youngjae gagged, and Junhong let out a loud aww.

“We’re taking bets on whether it takes Himchan or Jongup longer to notice,” Youngjae told him, even though so far, they’d done no such thing. Yongguk still wasn’t sure if members betting on each other was something he should allow in the group, especially considering they often bet food or real money. 

Junhong thought for a moment, pursing his lips. “Jongup-hyung.”

“Agreed,” Youngjae said, nodding. He raised an eyebrow at Yongguk and Daehyun, asking them their opinion.

“How much are we betting?” Yongguk asked, suspicious.

“Losers take the winners out to dinner?” Daehyun suggested. They nodded, agreeing to the terms.

“I say Jongup!” Daehyun said. He turned to Yongguk. “What about you?” Yongguk thought for a moment, but then he caught a little movement in the corner of his eye and smirked.

“Himchan.”

“Looks like you all owe him dinner,” Jongup said from behind them. He met Yongguk’s eyes and grinned as everyone spun around. “’Cause I just found out.”

A minute or so later, Himchan walked out of the bathroom to find everyone yelling about whether Yongguk cheated on the bet. “Honestly, Bbang. You’d think at least one of us wouldn’t bet on each other.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I also made a brand new B.A.P [ tumblr](https://onlystraightforjongup.tumblr.com/) so feel free to come talk to me there :)


	4. Working Together

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yongguk and Daehyun have learned how to work with each other over the years. Himchan and Jongup need a little help, but in the end, everything turns out okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone!
> 
> Warning for descriptions of an injury/throwing up

Soulmate bonds matured the minute a person turned eighteen. For Moon Jongup, that meant he’d go to sleep with an unopened bond and wake up with the ability to taste whatever touched his soulmate’s lips. That wasn’t a bad thing, per say. Yongguk’s bond matured in the middle of the afternoon, and it came with a touch of nausea and dizziness.

He found that understandable, considering it opened a link that connected his soul to Daehyun’s.

Often, the new soulmate’s cocktail of excitement and nervousness and _everything_ added to the general nausea. Soulmates were life partners, and logistics meant you rarely met your soulmate before the bond matured on both ends. Forming a connection with a stranger – even the perfect stranger for you – was objectively terrifying.

Of course, Yongguk shouldn’t have expected Himchan and Jongup to play by that rule. 

When Jongup came to him the night before his eighteenth birthday, Yongguk pushed down surprise because Jongup searched him out, not Himchan, not Daehyun. Jongup came to Yongguk with a stomach full of fear, biting at chapped lips that would soon taste whatever Himchan ate. 

Himchan told him once before that Jongup feared the bond, huffing because Jongup normally never refused him anything but wouldn’t tell him why he was so scared. Yongguk thought he understood because Himchan gave everything to Jongup, without limitations, but he sometimes still acted as though he didn’t realize Jongup did the same for him.

The two were very different people, but Yongguk supposed that’s why they were soulmates. At least, that’s how he and Daehyun worked. Yongguk hid a smile as Daehyun crossed his mind. This wasn’t the time for that.

“What’s wrong, Jongup-ah?” he asked after Jongup spent a few silent minutes sitting next to him in his studio. Jongup looked at his hands, shoulders slumped forward. Yongguk expected the silence by now. Jongup used words carefully; he wasn’t one to talk without meaning what he said or even one to talk before he knew exactly what he meant.

“I’m – scared, hyung. I don’t want the bond to –” He broke off to take a shuddering breath.

“Why not?” Yongguk asked, leaning forward to rest a hand on Jongup’s leg. He moved away from the touch, and Yongguk retracted it, respecting his personal space. Jongup’s shoulders trembled as he avoided Yongguk’s gaze.

“I think I already love someone,” Jongup said, and the miserable tone of his voice hurt Yongguk. “How can I do that to my soulmate, hyung? I’m supposed to be excited but all I want is –” He cut off, shaking his head.

Yongguk knew why he didn’t go to Himchan about this. Jongup loved Himchan, and he thought Himchan – and himself – had other soulmates waiting for them. After tonight, Jongup thought he’d face constant, every day reminders from his soulmate that Himchan wasn’t his, could never be his. Oh how wrong he was.

Yongguk knew Jongup would be furious when he learned they’d hidden so much from him for the past two years. God, Himchan had known since before they even debuted. Both Youngjae and Daehyun also knew, and though Junhong never brought it up, Yongguk wouldn’t be too surprised if he knew as well. Yongguk could only hope Jongup forgave them for it, that he understood why they couldn’t have just told him two years ago. 

“Hyung?” Jongup’s strained voice drew him out of his thoughts.

“It’s going to be okay, Jongup-ah,” he promised, unsure of what to tell him. Yongguk knew for a fact he’d get the results he wanted, but what could he tell Jongup? They’d kept the secret for too long for Jongup to find out from Yongguk only hours before he felt it. 

He’d said the wrong thing. Jongup nodded, his face darkening. Yongguk watched him close himself off, the way he’d opened up disappearing before his eyes.

“You’re right,” Jongup said. Then he was gone, the door of the studio banging shut after him. Yongguk frowned, wishing he’d had something better to say to Jongup. He could only hope Himchan knew what he was doing.

Yongguk trusted Himchan to handle the situation well; he knew Jongup better than anyone. Yongguk just hoped Jongup would understand.

He’d realize the next day, when Himchan’s hands shook as he ate, and Jongup’s bloodshot eyes were almost swollen shut that maybe he’d put too much pressure onto Himchan, assuming his situation with Jongup was different than he’d been with Daehyun.  


* * *

  
Yongguk tried to make his glances towards Jongup subtle, only stealing one every minute or so. He noticed with a frown that Daehyun and Youngjae weren’t hiding their curiosity much at all. Junhong sat next to Jongup, his worry etched into his face, and even he looked between Jongup and Himchan, his eyes flitted across the table and back as he ate.

“You okay, Jongup-ah?” Youngjae asked, finally breaking the tense silence that lay over them. Yongguk frowned as Jongup shrugged, his slumped shoulders only shifting the tiniest bit. He tried to offer them a smile, bit his eyes drifted towards Himchan, and any attempt died on his face. Jongup looked down again. 

Yongguk shot a look at Himchan, who avoided his gaze. The four of them shared exasperated looks because wow, Himchan and Jongup were both blind idiots. Daehyun tapped his fingers against Yongguk’s arm, and he turned, letting Daehyun stretch up so his lips reached Yongguk’s ear.

“Should we go? Just give them time to talk?” 

Yongguk hesitated, glancing at his watch. They had to leave for dance practice in a couple minutes. Himchan and Jongup would just have to wait until they finished for the day, Yongguk realized. He pushed down frustration with Himchan for not talking to Jongup before this.

He shook his head, seeing Daehyun bite his lip at his answer and glancing back towards Jongup. Yongguk wished he could tell the two to talk it out, to take as much time as needed, but they began promotions for One Shot in under two weeks.

Neither Jongup nor Himchan could possibly miss practice, especially not so soon before the release of their new music video. 

Daehyun sensed his hesitance and leaned against him, offering comfort through his body warmth and laying a light hand on Yongguk’s shoulder. Yongguk took a deep breath, hoping Jongup and Himchan could fix this soon.

He stood and took his dishes into their kitchen. Daehyun grabbed his hand, walking with him. The others followed, and Yongguk saw Himchan and Jongup throw away mostly-full plates of food, pointedly avoiding looking at each other and then glancing when the other wasn’t watching.

The two headed back to their rooms to grab their bags for a day at the studio.

“They’re infuriating,” Youngjae said, nodding his head towards where Himchan and Jongup’s rooms were. “They need to just kiss or whatever already.” Yongguk agreed, nodding.

“We need to do something about this,” Daehyun added. “There’s no way –”

“Let them handle it,” Yongguk said. “It’s –”

“Jongup-hyung’s been freaking out from weeks.” 

Yongguk frowned; he hadn’t noticed a difference in him until yesterday. He wondered if their botched conversation had caused Jongup to break the rest of the way 

“If Himchan-hyung hasn’t fixed it by now, then we need to step in.”

Yongguk hated stepping into things that weren’t his business, and he respected Himchan too much to tell Jongup his secrets. “We can’t do that.” He glanced at Daehyun, wondering what he thought about this. Yongguk couldn’t deny the similarities between this and their own past situation.

“I think we need to,” he said. “I know why you don’t want to, hyung, but I also know it took Youngjae telling me for us to even have a chance.”

“Youngjae told you?” Yongguk looked from Daehyun to Youngjae, who shrugged, raising an eyebrow at Yongguk.

“What?” he said. “I only hinted, and it needed to happen.” Yongguk shook his head at the lack of apology, but he figured he couldn’t fault Youngjae, considering how it all worked out. He took Daehyun’s hand in his own, and Daehyun shifted closer to him. The way their shoulders brushed together never failed to make Yongguk’s heart grow in his chest and a smile spread across his face. 

One of many things he’d learned about Daehyun was that if you gave him an arm, he often took both an arm and a leg. Yongguk didn’t mind that; he’d learned to appreciate – perhaps even love - how Daehyun never seemed satisfied with only a little touching, often pressing as much of his body as he could against Yongguk’s when given the chance. 

He took it as just another way Daehyun told Yongguk he loved him.

They didn’t often get a chance for much touching, considering schedules and how they had decided to keep their soulmate status away from their company, to avoid any possible repercussions from it, but they’d learned how to steal time and make everything work.

In some ways, Himchan and Jongup would find it even easier to work things out together. Himchan’s on-stage persona allowed for much more touching than Yongguk’s did, and the fans wouldn’t bat an eye if Himchan and Jongup spent an entire interview holding hands. If Yongguk tried the same thing with Daehyun, then fans would spend years talking about it.

He sometimes wished things were different, but at the same time, he appreciated the time they did have together. Yongguk knew he’d never get tired of spending free time curled up with Daehyun against his chest. 

They’d had their fair share of problems – just because fate decided they’d complement each other well didn’t mean everything stayed perfect without putting any work into it. It took Daehyun a long time to accept Yongguk wasn’t one for constant touching, and it took a decent amount of late-night talks to make it clear that Daehyun did nothing wrong on the days Yongguk wanted personal space. 

Yongguk, on the other hand, struggled with confiding in Daehyun, and it took him a long time to comprehend how to balance his soulmate Daehyun and his dongsaeng Daehyun.

The lines blurred almost constantly, but occasionally, Yongguk kept secrets from Daehyun because he didn’t know how to tell his other members yet. In those cases, he often confided in Himchan over Daehyun, appreciating Himchan’s mature, yet often different than his own way of considering situations. In much the same way, Daehyun talked about certain things to Youngjae, rather than to Yongguk.

He appreciated their ability to maintain their best friends within the group, and he knew Daehyun felt the same way. 

But for as much as he appreciated Himchan, Yongguk knew he was being an idiot right now and hurting Jongup in the process.

“If Himchan doesn’t tell him by the end of practice, then maybe,” he acquiesced. Moments later, Himchan and Jongup emerged, pointedly avoiding each other’s gaze even when Youngjae and Daehyun surrounded them and pushed them to walk to the studio so close together that their shoulders almost brushed.

Yongguk only realized just how bad of a decision he’d made when Himchan hit the ground, and then they were driving to a hospital, rather than the dance studio.  


* * *

  
Jongup wouldn’t sit down. Yongguk had long since stopped trying to get him to eat something and rest for a while, and now his eyes followed Jongup as he paced around the waiting room. After an hour long wait before the doctors could even see Himchan, they’d taken him into a room to evaluate the injury. The nurses couldn’t tell them anything yet, only that he may need surgery.

Ever since the nurses left the waiting room, Jongup had started pacing. The rest of them were sitting in chairs, containing their worry only a little better than Jongup. He could see Daehyun trembling, and Yongguk felt himself trembling, but with their manager there, and the possibility of someone taking photos, they couldn’t risk comforting each other.

Yongguk hated the fact he had to think about hiding his and Daehyun’s relationship when Himchan was hurt. In the hour they waited, Himchan’s face had paled more and more before beginning to turn a sickly green. Finally, he’d thrown up, his hand clenched tight against his chest and Jongup brushing his hair back as he hunched over a toilet.

Though Jongup had never been particularly sensitive to things like that, he’d also started gagging, and Daehyun had to pull him away before Jongup began to throw up too. After that Yongguk took care of Himchan.

At least that seemed to convince the nurses he needed some sort of priority, and he’d been taken in for evaluation not long after. A different nurse led the rest of them out of the emergency waiting room and into another very similar room, and Yongguk really had no idea where they were in comparison to Himchan.

That meant nurses coming out of any door could be coming for them. Jongup seemed to have decided on a particular door, because he only paced in front of one. In the beginning, Jongup had seemed terrified for Himchan, but after he’d been taken back, he was near inconsolable. 

His face turned ashen, and Yongguk could see his body trembling even from a solid distance away. He frowned at the change, before it suddenly hit him. Himchan threw up.

Jongup tasted it.

Yongguk’s heart hit rocket speed as he comprehended that Jongup must have realized Himchan was his soulmate, while also knowing Himchan was hurt badly and around a TS manager. He was impressed Jongup was handling everything as well as he was, given the scenario.

“Jongup-ah, come here,” he said. Jongup met his eyes, shaking his head with a sudden jerk and then counting to pace. Yongguk stood, walking over to physically grab Jongup’s arm. “You need air. Let’s go outside for a minute.”

It sounded nice in theory, if Yongguk had any idea how to reach outside. He met Daehyun’s eyes before he left, and Daehyun nodded at him. Yongguk knew he’d get a call if they learned anything about Himchan’s condition while he and Jongup were gone.

He steered Jongup through a door he knew didn’t lead to a restricted area. Jongup trembled, and Yongguk could feel the sweat on his shirt against his palm as he led Jongup through the hospital. He took a couple random turns, wishing he saw some sort of signage. 

“You have no clue where you’re going.” Jongup’s voice bordered on hysterical, cracking as he spoke, and Yongguk pressed his palm a little harder into his back.

“You needed to take a walk.” Yongguk said. He didn’t deny Jongup’s words.

“I was walking.”

“Doesn’t count.” Yongguk sighed. “Want to sit down for this or keep walking?” Jongup looked up at him, the shock and pain in his eyes enough for Yongguk to stop walking and pull him to the side. He slid down the wall, tugging on Jongup’s hand until he also sat down.

“How long have you all known?” Jongup asked, taking a shuddering breath and looking away from Yongguk.

“Years,” Yongguk admitted. “Himchan found out pretty quick.”

“No one ever told me.” Jongup didn’t sound angry, but Yongguk hated how flat his voice sounded more than any amount of anger.

“You know we couldn’t.” It was true. While telling a minor about the bond wasn’t illegal, per say, it was still wrong. Children were meant to discover themselves, learn who they were enough that when the bond did open, and they found whoever would share their life, they didn’t lose themselves in the relationship. 

“Why didn’t he tell me last night?” Jongup said. “Why didn’t you tell me? It was close enough.” His voice grew a little sharper, a little louder. Yongguk sighed, keeping his own voice even.

“He should have. Or I should have. I thought he’d do it but – he was scared.” Yongguk knew Jongup would ask him why and decided to answer the question before he had to ask. “It’s hard to admit that to someone.”

“I’m in love with him.”

“He’s stupid and thinks you just like him because he’s your hyung.” Yongguk rolled his eyes. For as much sympathy as he had for Himchan right now, he also couldn’t defend him. 

“I don’t treat him the same way I treat you.”

“I know that. We all know that. Hell, even the fans know that. Himchan’s scared to read too much into it so tell him that.” Jongup nodded, taking a deep breath. Yongguk watched him clenched his fists a couple times.

His phone buzzed in his pocket, and he pulled it out, checking his messages and standing back up once he saw Daehyun’s message.

“They’re going to let us see him soon,” he said, and Jongup immediately sped up, walking in front of Yongguk until he seemed to realize he didn’t know the way back. Yongguk pointed him in the right direction and sped up himself, trying to balance his own need to see Himchan with also keeping Jongup relatively calm.

“Jongup-ah?” Jongup’s eyes flashed towards his as they walked. “Wait until he’s not on pain meds to tell him you love him.”  


* * *

  
If anyone asked, Daehyun wasn’t going to admit how long it took him to gather the best food he could find in Taiwan. He’d probably regret the cost of it all later, but for now, he couldn’t hide a grin as he arranged his feast across the table. 

Youngjae set the camera up for him, focusing it on him and giving him a thumbs up before switching it on. Daehyun spread his arms wide, gesturing to all the food with a huge grin on his face as he introduced his segment. 

“I’m doing this to introduce the food to the fans. You shouldn’t think that it’s only because I want to eat it.” 

Honestly, Daehyun couldn’t believe everyone agreed when he suggested this for a chapter of Earth Attack. But hey, he wasn’t someone to question good things; if everyone wanted him to film a segment about him eating food then Daehyun would oblige. 

“Will any of you taste this tonight? I hope so. It all looks very good.” Daehyun winked at the camera, hinting to his fans that his soulmate would taste everything with him.

He saw Youngjae bite his lip, grinning and holding back a laugh as Daehyun very seriously hinted to his fans that his soulmate would taste everything with him. They all knew who would taste it.

He’d warned Yongguk a few hours ago to take his medicine; they couldn’t afford Yongguk cramping during a tour. Jongup raised an eyebrow at him as he paused, thoughts piling up, and Daehyun jumped back into the segment, continuing to introduce it.

“In the short time we’ve been given, I’ll try to film –” Youngjae gave up on holding back the laugh and paced away from the camera, and Daehyun stuttered, laughing as he finished his sentence. “A special video for the fans.” 

He paused, smiling into the camera. Jongup pulled out his phone, frowning as he unlocked it and read whatever message he’d gotten. Daehyun clasped his hands together, about to continue when Jongup looked up again. Just from the way his eyebrows pulled together, Daehyun could tell something was wrong and motioned him to shut off the camera.

“Himchan-hyung says hyung can’t find his pills.” Daehyun’s heart dropped in his chest, knowing the hyung Jongup referred to had to be Yongguk. 

“He definitely brought them,” Daehyun said, standing and stepping over to look at Jongup’s phone. Jongup dropped it before he saw the message, shrugging.

“He probably didn’t tell you cause you were excited for this,” Youngjae said, leaning against the doorway as he returned from his laughing fit. “You know he’d do that.” Daehyun frowned. He pulled out his phone, sucking his bottom lip between his teeth as he glanced through his messages. Nothing.

“I can’t make him sick.” His heart sank as he realized he wouldn’t get a chance to try the food he bought. 

“We told them we’d do this segment,” Youngjae said. Daehyun looked up, seeing Youngjae’s eyebrows drawn together and a frown stretched across his face. “We can’t just not do it.” Their managers were the “them” in question, and Daehyun knew he didn’t want to deal with trying to make up an excuse for why he suddenly couldn’t eat.

The less TS knew about him and Yongguk the better, lest they try to separate them, and Daehyun really couldn’t handle that.

“We could still do it,” Jongup suggested, glancing at his phone again and then at the food.

“I can’t eat any of it.”

“Youngjae and I can.” Daehyun decided he sounded way too happy about that. He glanced at the food he’d gathered, mourning that he’d not get a chance to eat it.

“We told them Daehyun was doing it though,” Youngjae said.

“You guys should steal it,” Daehyun said. “Film it like I’m doing it, but you guys end up eating it all.” He turned and moved back behind the food, looking it over as his stomach growled, prompted him to pat it remorsefully. Not tonight, it seemed. “I can eat a piece or two that way.” It wouldn’t bother Yongguk if he only ate a little.

“I don’t know.” Youngjae had moved over to the camera again. His fingers tapped on his leg as he thought. “Three of us eating the same thing at the same time? That’s risky.”

Daehyun nodded, his teeth playing with his lip again as he considered. “The fans won’t know what day we filmed it.”

“They know we filmed while in Taiwan.” 

Daehyun considered Youngjae’s words, taking a deep breath. They had to film this segment, but Youngjae was right that they couldn’t all eat the same thing. Babyz would know if they didn’t taste any of the food the possible nights (and they wouldn’t, considering all three of them had found their soulmates) that they weren’t soulmates with him, Jongup or Youngjae. 

Part of their job was to make their fans wonder if they could possibly have one of them as their soulmate. The three of them couldn’t eat the same food at the same time. 

“We’ll split it up,” he said, finally. “A lot of people eat chicken, so that one isn’t a problem. Youngjae, you take the mango bing.” He knew Youngjae loved it. “And Jongup, you take the bubble tea.” 

“I don’t even like bubble tea.” 

“Then tell Himchan-hyung we have it.” They all knew Himchan loved it. Jongup nodded, grabbing the drink and taking a sip rather than texting Himchan about it. Daehyun rolled his eyes, just a little jealous that Jongup could still eat everything. Himchan would probably even appreciate it.

His stomach growled again. 

“I’ll just take some chicken,” Jongup decided. He went to grab a piece, and Daehyun slapped his hand away.

“Not until we film!” he chastised. “That work, Youngjae?” He nodded, messing with the camera again and waiting for Daehyun to get ready to introduce the food. Daehyun took the opportunity to look over the food mournfully one last time before slapping a smile on his face and preparing to get angry at everyone stealing his food.

“You’re all paying me back for this,” he warned. Youngjae laughed and turned on the camera.

Despite Jongup telling Himchan about the bubble tea, he didn’t get there until all Daehyun’s food, except for a lone piece of mango and some of the floury cookie, was gone. 

“Ah, you ate it all then?” Himchan asked, grabbing the bubble tea. He took a sip of it, and Daehyun saw Jongup licking his lips from the taste of it. Daehyun frowned, wondering why Himchan thought he’d eat everything when he knew Yongguk didn’t have his medicine.

He hoped that didn’t mean Yongguk still cramped from the couple pieces of chicken he’d ate and the little bit of mango bing. Still, Daehyun couldn’t comment, so he hid his uncertainty and finished the broadcast, directing his anger at Youngjae, who stared at him with a self-satisfied grin.

Daehyun didn’t trust him. That grin looked way too real to be just for the fans. Youngjae switched the camera off, and Daehyun looked over at Himchan. He was still drinking the bubble tea.

“Is Yongguk-hyung okay?” he asked. “I didn’t eat much because –”

“You didn’t eat much?” Himchan frowned, cutting him off. “Why? Bbang took his medicine so you could.”

Daehyun’s eyebrows shot up his face. Himchan raised an eyebrow at him.

“Did you think he didn’t have it? He knew you were doing this.”

“You texted Jongup he didn’t have it!” Daehyun exclaimed, gesturing towards Jongup, who was trying to sneak away. It only took one look at Youngjae’s face for Daehyun to know what happened. “Hyung didn’t text you, did he?”

Jongup shook his head, looking way too satisfied with himself. Youngjae burst into laughter, moving back down the hallway and into his room. Daehyun pursued him, ignoring Himchan’s laugh and how he followed them with a camera. 

“I only ate three pieces!” he yelled. Youngjae looked at his laptop, having already sat down. Daehyun decided he looked way too comfortable and proud of himself. Jongup lingered behind them, giggling with Himchan, but Daehyun figured he’d deal with him anyway. “I only ate three… Really?” 

“Be thankful to this hyung,” Youngjae said, not even looking at him. The very clear disrespect surprised Daehyun – not because it was rare for Youngjae, unfortunately, but this was on camera. His mouth opened a little, and he tilted his head as he considered him. “Call me hyung-nim! Hyung-nim!”

For all his annoyance, Daehyun couldn’t help but chuckle at Youngjae’s craziness, setting down his drink on the counter and rushing at him. Youngjae’s words turned into grunts as Daehyun tried to knock him off the chair, and soon enough, both were laughing.

Daehyun stopped, half-draped over Youngjae and his chair, breathing a little heavy from the wrestling. Youngjae giggled under him. Jongup joined in on the laughter after they’d shut the camera off, but he quieted at Daehyun’s glare.

Even if Daehyun wasn’t too serious about being angry, Jongup still knew enough to tread carefully when he’d just cheated Daehyun out of an amazing meal.  


* * *

  
“You did horrible today.” Yongguk’s arms tightened around Daehyun as he teased him, and Daehyun sighed, leaning back against him and breathing in the scent of his shower gel. They had a rare couple minutes to themselves after an earlier performance and interview. Daehyun had managed to jump the line for the shower by convincing Yongguk to shower together. 

They were both still wet, and Daehyun knew his hair was leaving a big wet spot on Yongguk’s shirt, but Yongguk didn’t seem to mind, and Daehyun wasn’t going to give up a chance to cuddle. 

“You should be best at kissing me, not the worst.” 

“Don’t remind me.” Daehyun groaned, remembering how his face had darkened until he collapsed on his knees after Yongguk had pulled him close for a kissing game and winked, leaning in but not far enough.

Daehyun’s mind had short-circuited, as it normally did when Yongguk’s lips got close to his. Speaking of those lips, Daehyun felt Yongguk press a kiss into his wet hair and sighed, closing his eyes as the touch eased some of his embarrassment.

“You kiss everyone else. Why not me?” His arms tightened again, and Daehyun shifted against him, rolling his eyes. He knew Yongguk was joking around but couldn’t help his own embarrassment over the situation. Daehyun knew everyone well enough to know no one would let that go for weeks. “Seriously though, we okay?” He pulled Daehyun in a little closer, making him smile.

“Of course.” Daehyun wiggled until Yongguk loosened his arms, then turned and shifted so he curled up against Yongguk’s chest, now facing him. He glanced up, catching Yongguk’s soft smile as Daehyun leaned against him. Daehyun’s eyelids drooped, and he sighed into Yongguk’s warmth, loving how it comforted him.

Yongguk’s heartbeat pounded in his ear, and Daehyun pressed his cheek against Yongguk’s chest, breathing in the scent of his own shampoo and Yongguk’s body. 

“Sleep with me tonight?” Daehyun asked, opening one eye and glancing up at Yongguk. They tried to avoid spending too many nights together; Daehyun’s awkwardness around him on camera meant the fans perceived them as unsure around each other. Too many would find it weird if they roomed together in the dorms. Even so, Yongguk agreed to stay with him tonight.

Daehyun and Yongguk did everything they could to prevent people from finding what they did together weird, but Daehyun couldn’t help but act differently around Yongguk than around the other members. 

It was one thing for him to kiss Jongup on the cheek or throw himself all over Youngjae. Touching Yongguk mattered in a way those touches didn’t. Sure, Daehyun loved the other members, but Yongguk was his soulmate and touching him for fan service or almost-kissing him in games felt wrong.

“I don’t like fake-kissing you, and I can’t really kiss you so?” he shrugged, not raising his head off Yongguk’s chest. Yongguk shifted under him, moving until Daehyun felt his lips against his hair. The touch made him smile, and he rubbed his cheek against his chest.

A little heat rose in his cheeks at the gesture, and Daehyun wondered if he’d ever stopped blushing when Yongguk’s lips touched him. 

It didn’t happen all that often. Yongguk showed his affection in numerous ways, but those rarely involved direct physical contact. Sure, they had some contact, but Daehyun often initiated most of it. He’d taken that as a sign that Yongguk didn’t want him at first, and it bothered him for months until he finally comprehended that Yongguk just showed affection differently.

Thinking of the beginning of their relationship always made Daehyun smile and want to cringe, all at once. They’d messed up with each other over and over again, unsure and neither of them good at communication. It took a while for them to understand the differences between them; at first it seemed the universe conspired to put two of the most opposite people it could find together.

But over the years, Daehyun had realized Yongguk was exactly who he needed and vice versa. When stress overwhelmed Daehyun, Yongguk’s ability to remain calm and offer solid support helped, but when Yongguk needed support, Daehyun’s energy and constant smile lightened things just enough for some of the tension in Yongguk’s shoulders to disappear. 

They balanced each other, and Daehyun learned that Yongguk’s soft smiles and his concern for Daehyun’s wellbeing meant he loved Daehyun just as much as Daehyun’s love for cuddling and touch meant he loved Yongguk. 

His eyes always seemed to find Daehyun when they were in the same room, and even just Yongguk’s gaze helped center him. Then again, sometimes Daehyun’s eyes found Yongguk before he looked over. He supposed that meant they just looked for each other.

Daehyun sighed, feeling his muscles soften as he relaxed against Yongguk’s chest. He really couldn’t think of a better way to spend each night than with his body curled up against Yongguk’s, and Daehyun sometimes dreamed of later years, when no contract or company could make them do anything but spend every night together.

For as far away as that seemed, he appreciated the thought. Daehyun also accepted the situation as it was though; he and Yongguk wouldn’t get a chance to do that until after B.A.P retired, and none of them were ready for that. 

Daehyun frowned as his thoughts continued moving in the direction of their future. Things were changing for all of them, and he’d seen the stress painted across Yongguk’s face at the situation, even though he tried to hide it. Yongguk hadn’t yet told him what was happening, but Daehyun saw him and Himchan share long, torn looks when they thought no one was watching.

Daehyun knew that meant something was happening, and he hoped Yongguk would confide in him soon about it. But he understood Yongguk’s hesitance too and respected his judgement. 

Daehyun sighed, breathing in more of Yongguk’s shower gel scent and pushing the thoughts from his head. Not now, not when he still had tonight with Yongguk, who seemed to sense his sudden discomfort and leaned forward to press his face into Daehyun’s hair.

He felt Yongguk’s breaths move strands of his hair and felt the heat against his head. The tension finished draining out of him, and he let his eyes drift shut again, letting out another long sigh. This one showed relief, rather than stress.

“Hey,” Yongguk whispered the word, shifting a little to nudge Daehyun. He blinked open his eyes, groaning as Yongguk moved under him. “Come on.” Daehyun let Yongguk pull him to his feet, and they moved into Yongguk and Himchan’s bedroom, knowing Himchan wouldn’t mind them staying together tonight.

Yongguk moved onto the bed, pulling Daehyun up with him. Daehyun wiggled under the sheet, avoiding the blanket because they’d learned long ago that two bodies meant a lot more heat, and blankets would just make them overheat and push each other away during the night.

Yongguk laid on his back, quirking an eyebrow at Daehyun when he took a second to just appreciate how Yongguk looked. Daehyun grinned at him, leaning over to steal one more kiss before placing a leg over Yongguk’s hip and an arm over his chest.

He rested his cheek against Yongguk’s chest, feeling the beating of his heart. It echoed through Daehyun’s body, and his own heart slowed to match it. He closed his eyes, and sleep came quickly that night.  


* * *

  
“Which group member do you think would be the best soulmate for you?” the interviewer addressed Daehyun, who smiled back at the question. The smile came easy, despite how it had been two years since he’d answered this question and nearly eighteen months since they’d even had an interview. 

It wasn’t hard to smile when he felt so genuinely happy.

Before, Daehyun usually answered the question with Himchan or Jongup, giving a myriad of reasons because the fans always loved new information about how they’d treat their soulmates. Sometimes, they tried to point out stupid reasons, something that would make them laugh later. Three years ago, he told an interviewer Himchan was his most fitting soulmate because he needed someone who talked a lot. 

But today was different. He’d spent the last year and a half living with Yongguk, getting to sleep with him every night how he used to wish, even though the circumstances which allowed it hurt them all so badly. Daehyun couldn’t tell the truth, but he also couldn’t lie quite so easily in this interview.

His heart felt too happy for him to lie right now. His heart hurt too much for him to lie right now.

“Yongguk-hyung,” he said, smiling. Yongguk’s eyes flashed up to meet his, and Daehyun smiled even wider at how surprised he looked. He wants to say he’s grateful for all Yongguk did for him – for them – during the lawsuit, but he can’t say that now. They were putting the lawsuit behind them. Daehyun racked his thoughts for another possible reason. “Of everyone, hyung’s most likely to give me flowers.”

The interviewer smiled, but Daehyun’s eyes were focused on Yongguk, whose soft smile meant everything and more to Daehyun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I actually planned this entire fic to make the scene with Youngjae and Jongup conning Daehyun out of getting to eat his chicken. Of course, it grew into a lot more than that, but that's originally why I started this. :) 
> 
> Also I wasn't planning to have Himup figure things out like that at all, but I was researching what they were doing on Jongup's 18th birthday and turns out Himchan really did get hurt within a week after it. After I realized that, this just kind of happened. I hope no one minds about that.
> 
>  
> 
> Please let me know what you think! Thank you again to anyone who read this!


End file.
